Cheers to the concerts we won’t go to
and the movies we won’t see.
To the art that we won’t look at
and the people we’ll never be.
Here’s to the song I never finished
and the jacket I never gave back.
To the looks on people’s faces
wondering when we would crack.
So here’s to me crying at the table
and here’s to you standing up unstable.
To the ripped up photo in your wallet
and to the people that say they ‘totally called it.’
To the remnants of whispers and lost conversations,
to being on a pedestal with too high of expectations
and writing down talking points so we’d having something to say.
Anything I could think of that might make you stay,
but there were only three words I could think of then.
Still, I didn’t want to be the first to say it again.
The last time I was shaking and trembling with fear,
my only remedy, the words “I love you too dear.”
But it was never quite right
and it was founded on fright.
I was too consumed by your abnormality
to notice my waning vitality
and the ridiculous brutality
of our triviality.
I guess we just lost our spark,
but believe me, I loved our mindless little games,
question after question
until we went insane.
Night after night,
but did you do it out of spite?
That’s the question that I’m asking myself tonight.
I don’t know if I should mask my vulnerability
because it seems that I’ve lost all my sensibility.
When it comes to you,
my judgment’s screwed
and I don’t know how that can still be
because my heart still leaps when I hear your voice
pulling me back like I don’t have a choice.
I need to stop putting my happiness in your hands,
but it is so hard
to put up a guard
once it’s already been taken down.
So here’s to one unwritten letter
and the folks that said we’d never, come out of this one alive.
I survived.
Thank you very much.
And here’s, my dear, to all of our fears,
though they have come to life
because of our strife
no longer is the pain induced by one another.
We’re free to be however we please.
So cheers to us
and broken trust
and a love that was never meant to be.