Truth is, I am not fire and brimstone I am a soft breeze and summer mud– messy, impressionable, and inconvenient Nicole Deardorff is a 20-year-old queer actor, dancer, and writer. She began writing poetry as a way to stay sane. She isn’t sure how well that has worked, but she is […]
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Some people will always be burning. Girl, your lungs are not ashetrays. Neither is your heart. That doesn’t make you weak, it makes you human. Nicole Deardorff is a 20-year-old queer actor, dancer, and writer. She began writing poetry as a way to stay sane. She isn’t sure how well that has […]
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Smoking and kissing are two things I don’t take lightly I kiss hard, hazardously I kiss attacks, bruise, draw blood I kiss making sure you won’t forget me I smoke with chimney lungs I smoke deliciously, savoring each inhale I smoke so close to the butt my lips burn Want your lips to burn? […]
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is this how a haunted house feels? the aching, resignation, anger the constant longing for freedom all the wondering if it will ever end, all the wondering what it did to deserve the ghost do they get annoyed with everyone who has heard of the ghoul and come tramping all over them screaming Show me […]
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There are days when I still feel like misplaced bones when I stand in front of the mirror wanting to see all angles and hollows days when I swear I will fast until even my marrow cries out and my body feels as light and foggy as my head On these days, I name every […]
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I am ruination with ink-stained lips and blood under my nails I carve a calendar onto my skin so I will never forget where I come from (too many pills too many appointments) I am ruination with torn-bitten lips and melancholy mind I write my story on scraps of paper (leave them for strangers to […]
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Hurricanes have always been named after women but every woman I know who has been hit named the storm after a man Nicole Deardorff is a 19-year-old queer actor, dancer, and writer. She began writing poetry as a way to stay sane. She isn’t sure how well that has worked, […]
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To the boy with bruised knuckles who tried to take my wings: In the future, I hope you stick to punching brick walls instead of branching out to faces Nicole Deardorff is a 19-year-old queer actor, dancer, and writer. She began writing poetry as a way to stay sane. She isn’t sure […]
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They loped up to me ‘Baby, hold yourself together, they can smell your fear.’ I grew up warned, always held my breath and willed my fluttering heart to still when they passed by grinned wolfishly at my startled gaze, ‘Baby, don’t fall apart, they can sense weakness.’ she was waiting when the door slammed, showed […]
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