"Insecurities" is one of the August Writing Challenge entries that was chosen to be a featured story.
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Cassidy let out a sigh as she looked in the mirror one last time. “Always a photographer, never the model,” she muttered under her breath. She pulled her thin hair into a ponytail, slipping an extra hair-tie around her wrist before exiting the bathroom.
“I’m going to the beach. I’ll be back later tonight,” Cassidy informed her parents, snatching her steaming cup of coffee off of the kitchen table and throwing her backpack over her shoulder. Both of her parents nodded and told her to be safe on the road as she slipped out the front door.
The beach was only twenty minutes from Cassidy’s house, and as she pulled into a parking spot, she was greeted by her best friend.
“You’re late,” Carter scolded her. He hoisted his camera bag up higher on his shoulder and folded his arms across his chest.
Cassidy rolled her eyes and looked at her watch. “I’m right on time. You were just early,” she said. She pulled her backpack out of the backseat and checked to make sure she had all the proper lenses and equipment for the shoot today.
Carter opened his mouth, searching for a comeback, but eventually gave up. Instead, he asked, “Who are we shooting today?” The two of them walked through the parking lot towards the white sand and clear water that stretched as far as their eyes could see.
“Marisa. She needs/wants to do her senior pictures today,” Cassidy answered. Marisa was the reason Carter and Cassidy had started their business in the first place. Cassidy’s high school was crawling with aspiring actresses, which wasn’t rare in Los Angeles, and every one of them needed to have their pictures taken for one audition or another. Once Marisa had realized the best friends shared a talent for photography, she was quick to hire them. After showing off the pictures the next day, half of the school was begging to be next in line for a photoshoot.
After a while, Marisa came jogging down the beach. Cassidy felt her heart sink slightly when she noticed the way Carter smiled at Marisa and greeted her with a big hug. She wasn’t surprised, though. With her perfect makeup and long blonde hair, Marisa was the center of attention anywhere she went.
Cassidy straightened her shoulders and pushed her glasses up higher on her nose before smiling and walking over to her friends. She didn’t hate Marisa and she wasn’t bitter, but she did feel a tinge of jealousy bubbling in her stomach every once in a while.
Marisa pulled Cassidy into the same hug that she had engulfed Carter in. “Cass! Thanks for doing this on such short notice,” she said, smiling. Cassidy assured her that it was no problem and directed her where to stand for the first few shots. Carter snapped some pictures from a different angle. Having worked with Marisa since freshman year, both Cassidy and Carter knew her best angles and tried to work with that.
Marisa had posed for thirty shots when everyone took a break for lunch. They had started shooting around 11 AM and planned on staying until sunset, to have variety in the lighting. While Carter was at his car getting a new battery, Marisa looked at Cassidy with concern. “Cass, what’s wrong?” she asked.
Cassidy shook her head and looked at Marisa, confused. “Nothing,” she said. “Why do you think something’s wrong?” Marisa gave Cassidy a ‘don’t play dumb’ look.
“C’mon, Cass, I know you. You’ve been quieter than usual today, so what’s up?” she said.
Cassidy sighed and shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’ve just been feeling really down lately. Carter and I have been shooting all of your friends over the past few weeks and they’re just so pretty. I’m mad at myself that I can’t look like you guys,” Cassidy explained, wrapping her sandwich up, suddenly losing her appetite.
Marisa looked at Cassidy, her mouth agape. “Cassidy, are you crazy? You’re one of the most beautiful people I know. You have such a natural beauty to you that you don’t need all of the products that some girls rely on to feel beautiful.”
Cassidy stayed silent and let her eyes roam the beach, where they finally landed on Carter who was now slowly making his way over to the girls with a big grin on his face.
“This wouldn’t have anything to do with Carter, would it?” she asked, putting two and two together.
Cassidy quickly snapped out of her trance and shook her head, trying to deny the fact that Marisa was right. “Well,” Marisa started, “even if it was about him, you should know something. You don’t need makeup and nice clothes to get a guy to like you. True beauty comes from within, and I know that sounds so cheesy, but it’s true. I used to hide behind layers and layers of makeup until I finally became comfortable in my own skin. Now, I just use it to enhance the features that I’m already proud of.”
Cassidy nodded her head. “I guess you’re right. I don’t know, sometimes I just feel like I don’t fit in.” She sighed.
“Tell you what,” Marisa said, “if you promise me that you’re not going to hide behind a face that you’ve painted on with eye shadow and eyeliner like I did, then I’ll give you all of my makeup secrets. If you want this for you, and not for him, then I’m happy to help.”
Cassidy beamed and agreed.
“But can I tell you something else?” Marisa asked.
Cassidy nodded.
“This is the twenty-first century. None of us fit in.” She hugged Cassidy and both of them laughed.
Cassidy left that photoshoot feeling good about herself, like maybe she didn’t really need to have perfectl winged eyeliner to look good. For the first time in her life, Cassidy felt more comfortable in her own body than she ever had before.