October, 2015

Dear Future Me,

Stop it. Stop doing the things that suck the life out of you right now.
Stop giving people love and attention who make you feel bad about yourself.
Stop this activity that you’ve never even liked but only did because you were expected to.
Stop taking the advice of people who don’t know you at all.
Stop pretending to be someone you’re not, instead admire the beautiful person you already are.

I know it’s hard, and I know you feel like there is no way out, but there is. It’s quite simple: Do what you want to do. Do what makes you feel good.

Do you remember that feeling when you were dancing alone in your room to the music no one but you seemed to like? Or that time in summer when you rode your bike for hours through the forest just by yourself? You forgot time and place, you felt free, and you were so, so happy. This is how your life should feel. Don’t settle for anything else.

You’re scared of letting things go, I get that. You don’t want to be lonely, and you don’t want to hurt others. But don’t you see how by thinking that way you hurt yourself? Don’t you see that nothing, nothing in this world is worth breaking you? Believe me, you need to take this step of letting go. You need to have the courage to do what you know is right.
If something is killing you, cut it out. I promise you, it will pay off.

 

February, 2017

Dear Past Me,

Thank you. I am happy.  I’m still on a long, crazy journey, but I feel good. I wake up in the morning, and I’m not scared of the day ahead anymore. I feel like I have control over my life. I smile a lot. And yes, I still remember that time in summer. Now, there are even more days like that, and I enjoy every one of them.

Thank you. You did this. You had the courage to take a step you were petrified of. I’m so very proud of you.

Also, you’re right. I am beautiful, and I am strong — strong enough to do what my heart tells me to. I wish we would have realized this earlier, but I guess everything has its time.

Anyways, I thank you, I am proud of you, and I love you.

Kisses,
The Future You