Lolita Addresses Her Author by Clementine von Radics

Maybe you wanted to make a monster.
The story of a man destroyed by his own desires,
a snake swallowing a mouse whole.
Maybe you didn’t know how it feels.
The way men stare at little girls’ legs
like they’re lollipop sticks.lolita-book-cover
Like their sugar cube bodies
would melt in his mouth.
Maybe you don’t know then how it feels
to be devoured.  To open your bed
and find the Big Bad Wolf
in your mother’s clothes.

Maybe you’ve never seen a child
asking for attention in a language
she does not know how to speak.
Opening the softest, warmest
parts of her, asking for love
the only way she knows how.
But instead, all I am is what he made me.

Grown men spit out “Lolita”
as another word for “asking for it.”
Little girls playing at women,
red lipstick clacking like a lollipop
against their teeth. Children
read my story like a fairytale.
How can I forgive you
for turning me into the poison
other daughters learn to swallow?
Mr. Vladimir, you set out
to create a monster,
but you created the wrong one.

 

 

 

CaptureClementine von Radics lives in Portland, Oregon with three cats, one puppy, and six roommates. She has Rheumatoid Arthritis, a lot of tattoos, and a beautiful sister.  In 2012, Clementine founded Where Are You Press, a publishing house that focuses on the voices of young artists. She is the author of two collections of poetry, Home and As Often As Miracles.

 

 

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